Love letter to my Roomba

Dear robot vacuum,

Thank you for coming into my life and sharing my glories, triumphs, and failures with me. You have made such an impact on my well-being, and my floors, and I cannot thank you enough.

Before you came into my life, the constant cat hair and litter crumbs, the food flakes, the lint and hair, it was a constant nuisance, and such an elaborate orchestra of effort to clean.

For some reason, the broom and I had to break up. It just caused me pain and suffering, and importantly, would just move the cat hair around. Now that you are in my life, you have actually dealt with the cat hair. You sucked it up. You are a vacuum.

When times get tough, when you think you’re stuck on a ledge, but it’s just the chair leg, or a black rug, I will be there for you. The only time you falter is when you need to charge, which I understand, because, sames.

Now when I look at my house, I see a gleaming clean floor looking back at me. I can walk barefoot without getting the willies. And there you are, chilling in your little port. And this is truly a miracle.

Thank you, Roomba. I love you.